first-impression-back

Suppose it were your first day back at a job you previously held. What would you do to reassert your dominance?

• Climb on a table and bang any two loud objects together before declaring, "Your new master has arrived!"~
• Bring in 2-5 Nerf guns, and shoot up the place~
• Spend the whole day at your desk muttering loudly to yourself, rolling your eyes, sighing, and scribbling aggressively on a notepad. If anyone talks to you, pull a large notebook from your pocket and loudly sound out their name as you write it down.~
• T-pose everywhere you go. It's the surest way to assert dominance.~
• Mention at least twice in every conversation that, "you know, I was here — matter of fact, I helped start this place, really got this whole operation off the ground."~
• Every time you shake someone's hand, immediately apply hand sanitizer. Bring a bottle of Febreze, and use it liberally.~