angry-water

Sparkling water exists. What's your favorite explanation for how they make it?

• They have these failed standup comics who only tell jokes that are actually just mean, and they tell the jokes to the water repeatedly so it gets angry, and then they can it.~
• If you just stir water enough, it eventually stays bubbly.~
• For the flavored sparkling waters, someone whispers the name of a fruit in the next room over before the can is sealed.~
• They repeatedly strain out bubbles from regular water and collect them into cans separetely; some of the bubbles revert to regular water but enough stay bubbles to make the water sparkle.~
• Soda goes flat because the water and the bubbles are at war, and water forms an alliance with air and wins. By reinforcing the bubbles' military they can defeat the syrup stronghold in the soda, leaving only water, air, and bubbles.~